I hate how my ex is so fucking hot like how did I date a nine like I will never date another that hot god damn never date hot girls

last night before school and I kinda wish I had a gf that could just show up to my house right now but not for sex or something but just with a bottle of vodka and some joints and we could just chill in my backyard, whispering to not wake up anyone, maybe playing some beats out of our phones and just talk about the good times of this summer or what we want out of this year or just about stupid bullshit. Then around 12 she’d go home and we would be somewhat excited for tomorrow because that’d be the start of seeing eachother daily or something. 

idk i’ve always wanted to be in a couple that didnt say or do all that dumb lovey dovey bullshit and that immature thing where we post our feelings all the time but just like a friend i’d talk normally to and then we’d kiss every once in a while and even though we dont blah out the “i love yous” we can feel them there radiating off of eachother. 

also I really wanna get high again.



your body is 93% stardust so dont give up little star (ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧



anon hate is like the weakest thing ever. imagine anon hate in real life. imagine a stranger running up to you with a bag over their head and screaming at you. imagine that. thats anon hate.


this is a load of barnacles



this is a load of barnacles


give me ur address and i’ll rate the way u sleep and the way you bathe


*sends you a platonic nude*

Danny DeVito in Jurassic World

Why do you want to be a comedian?


the free stool with a glass of water on it